Black-Listed Magazine - Acceptance

Black-Listed Magazine have paid me the honour of featuring three of my poems in their latest update. It's a great magazine with plenty of rough hewn passion and disgust, so check it out!

My poems featured are ones on this very blog: Every Day in the Office, Hot Drive and Desperate Days.

Torture

Working in an office full of women is any man’s hell

the sense of humours are too different

you have to throw endless caution to the wind

and the worse thing is that you can’t stare

scrub that

the worst thing is that my desk faces the filing cabinet

all day I’m subjected to temptation

there’s bending over

relentless wiggling

this could truly be any man’s heaven

but there’s constantly female eyes watching me from behind

“That Benny’s a real pervert” they’d whisper

“He was looking down the back of your low slung trousers” they’d tell

I can afford the quickest of glimpses

from the very corner of my straining eye

but the frustration kills me

it’s worse than nothing at all

I need to move desks.

Gutter Eloquence Magazine - Acceptance

I bring good news that the mercurial Jack T Marlowe has accepted my poem 'Free Coffee' for issue 21 of his great online zine Gutter Eloquence. Check it out as you may well love it.

Chores

I tell her that I’ll take the rubbish out later

for now there’s football and wine

I go to get some cheese

she blocks my way

yells that later is too late

I’ll disturb the neighbours

like they never make noise

fucking all hours

what I wouldn’t do to go down there whilst he’s out

I begin to get a semi

realise I’m in the middle of an argument and lose it

damn

I tell her “Ok! Ok! I’ll take rubbish out”

she walks off victoriously

I go straight to the fridge

grab the cheese and head back to the TV

this is the life

wine, cheese and sport

if only that blonde from downstairs was here too

I hear footsteps go to the kitchen

the silence of exasperation is deafening

she storms in demanding to know why I lied

I tell her it can wait

I won’t wake the neighbours

she can’t judge me by her own noisy standards

look how many plates you crack or chip compared to me

that last statement dives like a whale

a long list of forgotten chores is read off to me

I tune out after a while as there’s an important free kick in the game

she’s staring at me expectantly

if I don’t give a decent answer now then I’m sleeping on the sofa

but what’s she been saying?

That damn sofa is too small for me

I look out the window for hope

I find it

the blonde from downstairs is putting out her rubbish

“Ok! Ok! I was wrong. I’ll put the rubbish out” I say

right answer

she walks off victoriously

I rush to the bins

chat to the blonde

she’s split up with that dick who fucks her

my semi returns.

Forbidden Lover

It’s 2 a.m and I’m on my way to see my forbidden lover she pounds the dirty backstreets of my mind does things that most girls would slap me for asking but her looks will never soothe my ego that’s why she remains a drunken rendezvous usually it would take me an hour to stumble this far but the sexual energy cuts through the drink I’m making good time does she cry herself to sleep when I leave or is that just my arrogance talking? perhaps it's her using me as an idiot with a hard cock because I’m certainly that we could be very happy together she makes me feel like a degenerate the only girl who’s managed that but this is a small town what would my friends say? I mean, she’s beautiful when she comes that screwed up face flushing imperfect breasts heaving completely lost to the passion no wonder I come so hard with her my insecurities may mean I’m lonely forever but who wants to compromise? she certainly doesn't she's got me - a real prince! these thoughts have done little to slow me down before I know it she’s answering the door wearing nothing but a t-shirt I press the palm of my hand against her pussy my middle finger lying perfectly in between her lips she gasps and arches her head back for now I'm hers.

Another 40 Years

I’m quietly reflecting with a Guinness

black, Dublin velvet in the corner of a pub booth

the rain is hammering down outside

shading the day with a miserable hue

work is a good half day away

I’m in Heaven

a group of old men hold court in the next booth

they’re talking of landlords past

Tommy Mochran was always dapper

but then they all were back then

I look at the bar to find the current landlord

this chainpub has no landlord

just a succession of business graduates

with no time to have beers waiting for the regulars

they’re too busy working out profit margins

these old men seem ridiculously happy

too old to work

too young to worry about death

they look forward to each day

they’re much like me when I was 18

this resemblance fills me with hope

maybe one day I’ll recapture that exuberance

the last decade’s worn it away

perhaps due to unrealistic expectation

did these old men have similar worries?

it’s easy to say they were from a more simple time

but I’m sure they wanted to put more than bread on the table

they wanted to nail that centrefold to it as well

I’ll find out the answer one day

but first I have to pay my dues

rushing out into the rain

to face life head on

for another 40 years.

Every Day in the Office

This office surrounds me with mediocrity

conversations are banal at best

I sink into my chair and try to fight the boredom

I take on some filing and lose

I look out the window at the office across the road

see endless reflections of myself

soul after soul at similar desks

clutching on to nothing

they never dreamt of this as a kid

a gang of three boys and a girl go past

they’re carrying crates of beer

lucky, young, free bastards

that girl will be crying by the end of the day

even the best male friend can break a girl's heart

the girls in this office are full of anxiety

all think they’re too fat

I’d fuck every single one of them

apart from the bitch of a boss

I do have some morals

lunchtime comes and there’s a stay of execution

there’s nowhere to go except the supermarket

the trolley collectors look blissfully happy

who argues with you over a trolley?

I sit in my car and eat my sandwiches

I’m surrounded by doppelgangers

all wondering where it went wrong

brushing the crumbs from their seats

I get back to the office

those damn kids are probably drunk now

that girl’s discovering what lies ahead from men

I’m sorting out the photocopier

I win the heartbreak stakes by a shade.